Words That Don't Exist but Should

1. AQUADEXTROUS - Possessing the ability to turn the bathroom faucet on and off with your toes.

2. CARPERPETUATION - The act, when vacuuming, of running over a string or a piece of lint at least a dozen times, reaching over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back down to give the vacuum one more chance.

3. DISCONFECT - To sterilize the piece of candy you dropped on the floor by blowing on it, assuming this will somehow 'remove' all the germs.

4. ELBONICS - The actions of two people maneuvering for one armrest in a movie theater or airplane.

5. FRUST - The small line of debris that refuses to be swept onto the dust pan and keep backing a person across the room until he finally decides to give up and sweep it under the rug.

6. PEPPIER - The waiter at a fancy restaurant whose sole purpose seems
to be walking around asking diners if they want ground pepper.

7. PHONESIA - The affliction of dialing a phone number and forgetting
whom you were calling just as they answer.

8. PUPKUS - The moist residue left on a window after a dog presses its nose to it.

9.TELECRASTINATION - The act of always letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick it up, even when you're only six inches away.

Filed in: humor