Miss Smartie Pants

From Miss Texas, since I am stopping in Dallas on my way to Nashville tonight:

THE 6 BEST SMART ASS ANSWERS OF 2006

SMART ASS ANSWER #6
It was mealtime during a flight on Hooters Airline. "Would you like dinner?" the flight attendant asked John, seated in front. "What are my choices?" John asked. "Yes or no," she replied.

SMART ASS ANSWER #5 A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened > > his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat, she said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub."

SMART ASS ANSWER #4 A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store but she couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."

SMART ASS ANSWER #3 The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said. The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could." When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.

SMART ASS ANSWER #2 A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads, "Low Bridge Ahead." Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?" The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas."

SMART ASS ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2006 A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!" A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head and sweetly says, "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."

Bernie Hume earthquake photos

With thanks to Joe Lemeaux and the fine folks at the Seward Library, here are more photos of the 1964 Good Friday Earthquake from the private collection of the late Bernie Hume.

Good Friday remembered by a Good Man

With thanks to Joe Lemeaux and the fine folks at the Seward Library, here are photos of the 1964 Good Friday Earthquake from the private collection of the late Bernie Hume.

Seward Girls

Thank you to Sara Nan of Alaskan Memories Photo for the babe shot of Casmir and myself.

Jesse Lee Subject of New Book

Jesse Lee Stories Sought for New Book

The Jesse Lee Home is the focus of a new book. Family After All: Alaska's Jesse Lee Home [Unalaska 1889-1925, Seward 1925-1965] is planned as a two-volume compilation of reminiscences and writings by and about the residents of the Jesse Lee Home.

Author/compiler Jackie Pels became interested in Jesse Lee Home stories when she learned that her cousin's wife, Ann Wemark Rogers, was one of three Jesse Lee teenagers who became the first women to complete the Mount Marathon Race. Ann and her siblings lived at the Home after World War II, while their parents, Joy and McKenna Wemark, were recovering from tuberculosis at the Seward Sanatorium.

"In the process of researching my last book, Any Tonnage, Any Ocean, about Captain Walter Jackinsky of Ninilchik, I met two more former "Jesse Lee kids," his half-sister Barbara Jaklin Redmond of Wasilla and his old friend Fred Lange of Cordova, each with stories diferent from the other's and from that of the Wemark family," reports Pels. "I decided that I could not let any other writing project get in the way of Jesse Lee, and I've been working on it now for almost two years."

Jackie Pels has stronger ties to Seward than the average Northern Californian, and that has no doubt influenced her decision to feature Seward in her writings.

"I have just had the pleasure of finishing a chapter on the founding of Seward General Hosptial and its links to the Jesse Lee Home," Pels says. "I was born in that old schoolhouse-hospital, and some of my Unga Island counsins were the first baby and then the first set of twins born there."

Pels has traveled to Arizona, southern California, Oregon, Washington and all over Alaska to gather Jesse Lee stories and photographs. She plans to travel to New Mexico and Wyoming in the near future to meet with several more Jesse Lee residents.

"People in Seward have been extraordinarily helpful, beginning with Patrica Ray Williams, who worked besider her father, mayor of Seward at the time, helping to clear the land for the Home in 1925," suggests Pel. "Would I like to hear from even more people? You bet! I'm particularly keen to hear from anyone with specific information about two times when the Home closed - in the World War II years, when the children were sent to a variety of locations, and, of course, after the 1964 earthquake, when again the children were displaced."

Pel is also looking for photographs of the Jesse Lee statue of Balto, a copy of which stands in a New York City park.
Some have suggested that the statue disappeared after the earthquake, while Jesse Lee resident Dr. James Simpson reports it went missing much earlier than that. Pel suggests that confusion about the Home is common.

"I have a file marked 'Bogus', for particularly dismaying examples of misinformation that will probably be included in an appendix to Volume II," explains Pel. "Most misinformation isn't intentional, it just happens. Something misheard or misunderstood gets passed on and printed and embroidered and reprinted and finally ends up considered 'fact'. We have worked hard to uncover those layers of misinformation and get at the real facts. It's been a daunting and sometimes humorous process."

The introduction to the books addresses the misinformation discovered about the Jesse Lee Home. “For the seeker after historical accuracy, of course, all sources are suspect. Newspaper accounts and even history texts are sometimes colored by fad or ism – boosterism, jingoism, racism. Children’s writings are subject to adult approval; adult memories of childhood are filtered through intervening events. Over the course of the book we have tried to balance varying accounts, to get to the bottom of things. There are no villains. There is some heroism. Mostly there are people of all ages trying to do, as Billy Blackjack Johnson said of his teachers, ‘the best they could with what they knew at the time.’”

Retired Unalaska teacher Ray Hudson is writing the first volume of the story, which covers the 40 years the Jesse Lee Home was located in Unalaska. Those with information about the 40 years the Jesse Lee Home operated in Seward can contact Jackie Pels c/o Hardscratch Press, 2358 Banbury Place, Walnut Creek, California 94598, telephone 925.935.3422 or e-mail at jrbpels@hardscratchpress.com.

"Next year, 2007, is the 80th anniversary of Benny Benson’s flag and the 70th “anniversary” of my arrival at Seward General Hospital," explains Pels. "I plan to celebrate both with a new book in Seward!"

A Closer Look at Interim City Manager Candidates

There are a number of candidates trying out for the interim Seward City Manager position. Lets take a closer look and see who our favorite is:

Marvin Yoder
Candidate Marvin Yoder has been doing a lot of explaining lately. According to a recent article by Robert Howl, Nuclear secrets buried in open sight, The danger of Alaska’s nuclear legacy Yoder is "City manager of Galena, a small town of about 700 souls along the Yukon River 300 miles northwest of Anchorage, Yoder and city council members are spearheading a plan to power the place with plutonium.

Or uranium.

They are looking at an underground, 10-megawatt nuclear reactor being developed by Toshiba Corporation in Japan.

“We already went through a feasibility study, and we got some money for environmental studies,” Yoder said in a telephone interview, citing a $500,000 grant from the Alaska legislature.

Now the questions are piling up about security, containment of the vessel, and cost-to-benefit ratios.

Galena, as most other rural communities in the Yukon-Kuskokwim River drainages, imports its yearly supply of diesel fuel at high cost via river barge each year.

Electricity costs in rural Alaska are exorbitant-more than three and a half times the national average per kilowatt hour-and Yoder said it is in the long-term interest of his community to explore the nuclear option.

“We’re moving ahead with this. We’ll see what happens.”

Compared with other small-scale nuclear power plants in America, the Galena proposal is fairly miniscule. For example, it would be about one-fortieth of the size production facilities such as the Fort Calhoun Nuclear Plant in Omaha, Nebraska, at 470 megawatts.

Regardless, the idea has raised concerns from groups including the Yukon River Intertribal Watershed Council and the non-profit Reactor Watchdog Project, based in Washington, D.C."

Hmmm, after the alternate energy proposals for a natural gas plant, hydro plant, and coal plant were so well received by council - consideration of this pro-nuclear guy could be entertaining...I predict 30 seconds before someone has a meltdown.



Scott Williams
Scott Williams is perhaps the most "interesting" of all the interim city manager candidates. According to Wickipedia, Williams is an American alleged serial killer who is accused of murdering and mutilating three prostitutes in Union county, North Carolina between 1997 and 2006. He has yet to go to trial so I guess he has some free time on his hands, and the close proximity of the jail to the city manager's office assures a quick commute.



Lee Houston
Applicant Lee Houston is credited with developing some pretty famous video games, including: The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo (2006), I-Play Metal Slug: Mobile (2004), and I-Play VR Sports Powerboat Racing (1998), Interplay Entertainment Corp. Hey, if the past is any indication, gamesmanship is important in a city managers.



Matt Rowley
Also applying is Matt Rowley, author of The Joy of Moonshine: Recipes Tall Tales Drinking Songs Historical Stuff Knee-slappers How to Make it How to Drink it.
..published in July 2006 by Lark Books. The ISBN is 1579906586 and Lists for $14.95. This one is just too easy. I am sure he is going to be a real hit with Vanta and Linda.



David Squires
According to the resume posted online by David Squires his employment experience includes Developmental Pathways Study Process: Designs staff development approaches to assisting schools to understand children's development through the examination of a child’s life during a year, by keeping non-judgmental records, sharing those records in a group, and learning about Comer's six developmental pathways.

We are sure that the skills he gathered examing the development of elementary school children in a non-judgmental way will assist him in working in the interim city manager position, as well as the time he spent working at The Beach Club, Conneaut Lake, PA, Bartender, summers of 1969 - 70. Fanwood Swim Club, Fanwood, NJ, Life Guard and Swim Coach, 1967. And most importantly at the Mine Safety Co., Wilkinsburg, PA, Carpenter's Helper, summer, 1966.



Pat Reilly
Reilly's carrier started with Hideout in the Sun (1960.) Following that he was in the film Nude on the Moon (1961,)aka Girls on the Moon, aka Moon Dolls (USA: bowdlerized title, aka Nature Girls on the Moon, aka Nudes on the Moon.

He portrayed the Fort Worth - First Referee in Tough Enough (1983) before capturing Stretch Hendricks in "Dear John" (2 episodes, 1990.)Pat then played the 4th Thug in Delusion (1991), then Paramedic One in Future Shock (1993.)

The most appropriate role that tells us that Pat is a viable candidate for interim Seward City Manager is the last one, a Porter in Raising Hell (2003).

Well, that rounds out the field. Post a comment and tell us who you are rooting for.

Interim City Manager Interviews are scheduled for Tuesday, November 21, 2006 from 4:00 to 6:30 p.m. in the City Council Chambers. The "Public is Urged to Attend !!"

Pat Reilly – 4:00 p.m., David Squires – 4:20 p.m., Matt Rowley – 4:40 p.m., Lee Houston – 5:00 p.m., Scott Williams – 5:20 p.m., Marvin Yoder – 5:40 p.m.

Seward City Clerk Jean Lewis advises:

Sorry I went home instead of sending this message, but the city council will be negotiating an interim contract with a gentleman named Marvin Yoder. It appears he will be here on a part time basis and has over 20 years of city manager experience moving projects forward. We will begin advertising for a permanent city manager immediately.--Jean